wed 23rd aug...

sigh. what a night! if only i had pay more attention to the needs of others around me. i swear it was freaking scary. didnt expect things to turn out this way. this is what happens when we take smone for granted. esp smone we love so dearly. made the call and then the crying began again. didnt know what to say in times like this. if i knew it was so terrible, i would have scolded the bitch upfront. wth. so not encouraging. has she forgotten that we are brothers and sisters in Christ? isnt the class all about learning together? so why the fuck did the bitch say that the things she shared are fei4 hua4? fuck u! fuck u for being such an asshole. for causing unnecessary hurt and upsetting my loved one so much. pui.*

jus wondering why things always turn out to be so ugly all the time, in the midst of so looking forward to see one another, and jus one issue, and everythg turn sour. fuck that man.

that aside. realised that yisanba has been trying to be funny with me. and smhow, i wish what she said was true! i would have been over the moon. but the sister will always be a barrier. haha. it appears to me that ysb kept trying to like prompt me to speak. from my observation, it has been around 3 wks since that happen. all the evidence seems to point at one direction, haaa. but perhaps it was never intended for, and jus wishful thinking on my own part.

armragte.

hmmm. poor girl. new staff and got tekan, being throwed so much work. sigh. feel so sad for her. jus hope that she wil pull thru and prove all of em wrong. no idea why certain ppl can be so nasty.. jus mere 4 days and they expect her to know everythg? impossible what! even if u want smone to learn, thats nt the way to do it what...! sigh. feel so so sorry for her. poor thing! she even came bk to office on sat to wk can! arghh.

aunty susan.

saw her on fri and i realise i miss her! miss her booming voice, and miss her passionate heart for bringing more to God, even tho she sort of got into my nerves during the rally on fri. shdnt have gone. smhow i jus cannot comprehend all the slaining and speaking in tongues thingy. its super scary for me! and there was this girl who got the monkey spirit in her. sounded kinda farnie but its horrifying too! she was shriekign and screaming, saying "bu yao" and the elders and pastor kept praying for her, driving the devil out. was damn scary scene. *creepy.

other than that, havent been getting enough rest. ot almost every other day and its driving me bonkers. i wanna go home at 6!!! sobs. got my zara in red n white stripes. dunno why they have to give dumb comments that i honestly dont need time and again. sigh. thnk i need to change my wardrobe. need to get tudungs, and long sleeves and long pants. all covered up. whee!

its disciple class again tongiht. hope i dont screw up. and i want less ot and more dinner time with my lovelies! i want to shop too. if only my salary wil come in like now. sigh. need to wait at least a gd old 2 wks. ugh. hair's jutting out, 1 word, ugly. sobs. but i wanna keep it leh! sigh. wanna go sentosa too, and swimming and tanning! but ive got no time. boo*

time for an update.

its back to cnc again. ok right the other time i said the signs are clear that i shd leave. but anw, im back there, and wj with me this time. anyway, waking up at 7 sucks big time. eeks. and squeezing with ppl on the bus is eeky too. not much work to be done, since its the mere beginning of the month. goodie. can slack. haaaa.

twinnie came over to stay on tues.. but had to rush home ytd half way cos her daddy's cut his finger. 1/3 of it came off. freaking scary. so had surgery last night. hope all's well and that everybody at home is ok too.

over at marina to catch a glimpse of the fireworks on tues. quite pretty, but it was dumb that we spent time queing at ljs, wasting our chances to catch the whole 12 mins. perhaps shd go down again on sat. hehheh. twinnie might be gg dubai at the end of yr. i wanna go too. but i dont have the moolah leh. if only i can save all my pay, then i'll follow her. but im scared. freaking scared that ltr when we're thr, they'll wanna do stupid stuff.. like clubbing/marijuanaing, smoke pot. then i wil faint. since her fren's pretty notorious. haaa. oops.

other than that, ive attempted packing my clothes into the cupboard. but suck it la, cupboards freaking ugly, and one side of the door seems to be falling out pretty soon. hope it happens soon, so that i can get a new one. perhaps i shd keep banging it, n then it wil fall out.

chaaa~!

been putting up at twinnie's place for 1 wk already. everyone's really nice, except that i stil get the jitters when we have dinner tog. hais. cant help feeling super shy n paiseh. haaaa. have been slacking all day long, watching satc, and sleeping most of the time. feel like a paralyzed nw. oops.

getting used to the hair nw, doesnt seem as heavy or irritating nw. but i dropped 1 strand of the dreadlocks on friday! ugh. yati picked it up for me and tied a knot. smwhat look like a pretzel. wahaha. think will take it off pretty soon. but other than that, im loving my hair! have received pretty cool comments abt it. hahaaa. quite fun actually, smthg diff i guess!

am lacking of ice cubes. cos twinnie forbid me to eat them. but 1 or 2 occasionally. feel like im a drug addict. only diff is im an ice addict. sigh. thinking of them simply makes me drool. anyway... its discipleship class tmr. so fast. and ive yet to done the work. ugh... hope we can drive out later to have ice cream or smthg. im pretty bored cooped up at home all day long. makes me super lazy.

jus realised i havent enrol for sim jan intake. hope i'll get it done soon. chaaaaa~!