i like today's weather. hee. somewhat dark, gloomy and cooling. makes one feel like sleeping. anyway i decided to rid tt previous post, cuz my purpose wasnt to attract apologies or whatsoever. so here i am, blogging away, when im supposed to be making my way for ibs. nvm, shan't disclose the details.
changed my blogskin, and since there's the archives section, decided to read my postings which were one yr old plus. i think i've changed so much. for the better, or worse i dont know. but i think it shd be the latter. used to be so chirpy, so full of vibrancy. in fact i seemed to be really happy hanging out with liz, jess, zw.. life then was pretty much revolving around school and church. i mean it still is now, but somewhat different. couldnt quite explain it. mayb i've learnt to shun away from things that i dont like. mayb this, mayb that. the list just goes on. cant really find that kind of real happiness that radiates from within now. im nv happy deep down. not these days. and in just one year, things can actually change so much. simply makes one shudder. perhaps as a person's blog gets more and more exposed to many people, the chances of pouring out yr real thoughts are getting slimmer and slimmer. and yes, my dear God was also always mentioned, praising Him, thanking Him for all that He have done for me. but now? ... how can life be so good in the past, and yet take a sudden plunge when u least expect it.
perhaps as i grow older, the world appears to be full of cynicism. and there's no one u can trust. except God. but sometimes, i even doubt the existence of God. so much for my faith.
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